tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-55958223566285027522024-03-12T22:46:22.544+00:00The Good ShepherdShubby Doohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739382022583876470noreply@blogger.comBlogger47125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5595822356628502752.post-89342838505955075512014-07-05T14:18:00.001+01:002014-07-05T20:03:11.957+01:00lifeThese cruel games...I cried to sleep yesterday. Everybody is happy I won but I feel empty inside. This job is punishing. I can't seem to escape the tyrannical ghouls. <div><br></div><div>Slowly I start to suffocate as they squeeze me in tighter<br><div><div><br></div><div>I thought about inviting a knife to my wrist or about being reckless just to feel something instead of this. I never did have the stomach for 'it's complicated.</div><div><br></div><div><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue Light', HelveticaNeue-Light, helvetica, arial, sans-serif;">This depression is real...I'm falling to depths I'm scared to realise even exist. </span></div><div><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue Light', HelveticaNeue-Light, helvetica, arial, sans-serif;"><br></span></div><div>When there were no more tears I <span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue Light', HelveticaNeue-Light, helvetica, arial, sans-serif;">opted for the simple...a vacuum of silent solitude</span><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue Light', HelveticaNeue-Light, helvetica, arial, sans-serif;">.</span></div></div></div>Shubby Doohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739382022583876470noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5595822356628502752.post-59173694297876998812014-06-29T19:51:00.001+01:002014-06-29T19:51:22.188+01:00refugeI haven't been here in a while...my silent refuge. My hideaway for rationalisation, refocus and clarity that allowed for my evolution. Endless virtual space to unload.<div><br></div><div>I'm back because I need that again.</div><div><br></div><div>Somewhere along the line, I stopped believing. To coin a phrase from Nashville 'My prayers hit the ceiling'. I simply crashed...Or so it feels... </div><div><br></div><div>Whatever will I do with myself...</div>Shubby Doohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739382022583876470noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5595822356628502752.post-74006321092519446562010-02-06T22:21:00.060+00:002010-02-21T02:04:32.431+00:00ghost in the shell<span style="color:#c0c0c0;">‘Search me, O God, and know my heart; </span><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">test me and know my anxious thoughts. </span><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">See if there is any offensive way in me, </span><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">and lead me in the way everlasting.’ </span><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;"></span><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Psalm 139: 23-24 </span><br /><br />Yet, I stay here still. I should leave... just walk away... but as I'm unsure of myself, my <span style="color:#cc6600;">soul</span> remains bound to its shell; confined. Am I only free to expand myself within boundaries that have been created? In <span style="color:#cc6600;">truth</span> all things change so perhaps it is my efforts to stay the same that have limited me. Perhaps that is why a love that I had craved so much was simply unable to break down my walls and complete me.<br /><br />Sometimes I wished I had not <span style="color:#cc6600;">dreamed</span> this <span style="color:#cc6600;">dream</span> so hard... perhaps then I would not have felt so lost when <span style="color:#cc6600;">Reverie became reality</span>. Till today, I have no idea why I stood silent, like a dumb mute, with no answers to his gestures. My <span style="color:#cc6600;">ghost</span> whispers contemptuously <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">‘ghost-hacked humans are so pathetic, it's a shame’</span>. I can only sigh in agreement as I tell out my <span style="color:#cc6600;">soul.</span><br /><br />All I want to do now is pretend it was just a <span style="color:#cc6600;">simulated experience</span>. False, like a <span style="color:#cc6600;">dream</span>. Yet it happened. My <span style="color:#cc6600;">fantasy was real</span>. My <span style="color:#cc6600;">ghost</span> whispers sadly <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">‘we weep for the blood of a bird, but not for the blood of a fish. Blessed are those with a voice’</span>. I cannot weep because I do not know how I lost mine, yet I bleed.<br /><br />I dare not <span style="color:#cc6600;">dream</span> anymore. My voice is gone. My actions seem to echo those of a coward. But I tried. I swear I tried... so much so that even distance could not come between us. My <span style="color:#cc6600;">ghost </span>whispers mockingly <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">‘no matter how far a jackass travels, it will never return a horse’</span>. My thoughts shift suddenly to Italy. Alone in Milan with the lure of speed as my only friend. Life raced by me that September weekend but somehow it failed to take my hopes with it.<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Just a whisper. I hear it in my ghost. </span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Reverie.</span><br /><br />Today, again, he is close by. However, today is the first time in a long time, that I have chosen not to reach out. I do so, not to punish him but myself; should he not notice. Perhaps this will finally prove to me that when he looks at me, he sees in me only <span style="color:#cc6600;">golem</span>; an absence of form yet to be shaped from mud. Yet do I not already know this to be untrue? Simply because he helped fix my fragmented form. He stopped my heart's demise and then reconstructed my being using the clays of hope on the river banks of my tears. Happily, I morphed. I became the <a href="http://shubbydoo.blogspot.com/2008/07/child-of-dream.html"><span style="color:#990000;">child of a dream</span></a>. I laugh as I look up to the heavens, not in wonderment but with a certainty that <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">‘life perpetuates itself through diversity and this includes the ability to sacrifice itself when necessary’</span>. Yet when I look within, inside my <span style="color:#cc6600;">Section 9</span>, I have no idea of how to cope with a such a loss. <span style="color:#cc6600;">Major</span>.<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Just a whisper. I hear it in my ghost. </span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Aemaeth.</span><br /><br />Perhaps I am the unknown <span style="color:#cc6600;">puppet master</span> that has been pulling my own strings; forcing myself to remember… how he pulled me close… his kiss… the times he made love to me. What of my feelings for the future?... were they just mere <a href="http://shubbydoo.blogspot.com/2008/08/trick-modes.html"><span style="color:#990000;">trick modes</span></a>? This thought alone cuts me; causing a solitary sob to escape from me mid-flight. I begin to plummet into a cloud of despair. I am bleeding more now but still I choose to go... to forget. I fear that when next I hear him call my name my heart will soar again with childish joy and instinctively, I will turn and run back... I always have. Sometimes I wish my heart would turn to stone instead of being set alight by the blaze of his warmth. I look to the mirror; searching for my <span style="color:#cc6600;">truth</span>. My <span style="color:#cc6600;">ghost </span>whispers scornfully <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">‘when one’s face is distorted why you should blame the mirror? The mirror doesn’t help to enlighten but rather to confuse’</span>. So I stop staring at myself and I rub my forehead; robbing it of <span style="color:#cc6600;">truth</span>.<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Just a whisper. I hear it in my ghost. </span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Maeth.</span><br /><br />Looking back, I realise that the universe conspired to keep us apart. What could be… cannot. The <span style="color:#cc6600;">dream</span> must die, for I choose to live. I finally understand. I hug my <span style="color:#cc6600;">ghost</span> as it whispers reassuringly <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">‘life and death come and go like marionettes dancing on a table. Once their strings are cut, they easily crumble’</span>.<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Good Shepherd, I know not of tomorrow so just for tonight all I dare ask is</span> <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">‘let one walk alone, committing no sin, with few wishes, like elephants in the forest’</span><span style="color:#cc6600;">. Please.</span>Shubby Doohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739382022583876470noreply@blogger.com32tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5595822356628502752.post-43456112853424792242010-01-13T10:34:00.025+00:002010-01-14T20:35:34.915+00:00sex, lies &...4. blackberry<span style="color:#cc6600;">Ash: Shubby Doo. You! Left Lagos without saying goodbye<br />Shubby Doo: Sorry sweetie. How now?<br />Ash: I'm good. So now I find out that you're a baaaaaaaaaaaaad girl. Interesting ;) Now you must tell </span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Shubby Doo: Rules say just the score o! Besides you know I'm an angel<br />Ash: Angels barely get 100. I'm on 335 so I wanna know about your score<br />Shubby Doo: Crap, yours is lower than mine... o lawdy! :S<br />Ash: Yeah yeah just tell </span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Shubby Doo: How about you first?</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Ash: You know I will tell you but you on ther other hand are the wild card!!!</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Shubby Doo: LOL...ok maybe I was little naughty but I'm still so nice!!! ;)</span><br /><br />So I’m wondering whether to <span style="color:#cc6600;">lie</span> or keep quiet... besides if I <span style="color:#cc6600;">lie</span>, the numbers won't add up and that means more explanations. Silence is best I think... definitely going the strong silence route... silence is that one thing that is so fragile that saying it breaks it.<br /><br />But I do plan to have a little fun with him. You see his inquisition (on predominantly my <span style="color:#cc6600;">sexual exploits</span>) is because this turned up on my<span style="color:#cc6600;"> blackberry</span> yesterday night… I read it and decided to play along so I tallied up my dues and I changed my status accordingly.<br /><br />Feel free to have a go... and let me know your score!<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">This is fun to do. Just read the 'offence' and if you've done it, you owe that fine. You don't have to confess your answers, just the amount of your fine.</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">NOTE fines to be added once, not for how ever many times you have done it....</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Put in your profile My fine is £XX (whatever amount is!)</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;"></span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">01. Smoked weed -- £10 </span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">02. Did acid or pills -- £5</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">03. Ever had sex at church -- £25</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">04. Woke up in the morning & didn't know the person who was next to you -- £40 </span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">05. Had sex with someone on MySpace/Facebook/Bebo etc -- £25</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">06. Had sex for money -- £100</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">07. Ever had sex with a Puerto Rican -- £20</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">08. Vandalised something -- £20</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">09. Had sex on your parents' bed -- £10</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">10. Beat up someone -- £20</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">11. Been jumped -- £10</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">12. Cross dressed -- £10</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">13. Given money to stripper -- £25</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">14. Been in love with a stripper -- £20</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">15. Kissed someone who's name you didn't know -- £0.10</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">16. Hit on some one of the same sex while at work -- £15</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">17. Ever drive and drank -- £20</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">18. Ever got drunk at work, or went to work while still drunk -- £50</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">19. Used toys while having sex -- £30</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">20. Got drunk, passed out and don't remember the night before -- £20</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">21. Went skinny dipping -- £5</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">22. Had sex in a pool -- £20</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">23 Kissed someone of the same sex -- £10</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">24. Had sex with someone of the same sex -- £20</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">25. Cheated on your significant other -- £10</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">26. Masturbated -- £10</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">27. Cheated on your significant other with their relative or close friend -- £20</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">28. Done oral -- £5</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">29. Got oral -- £5</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">30. Done / got oral in a vehicle while it was moving -- £25</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">31. Stole something -- £10</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">32. Had sex with someone in jail -- £25</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">33. Made a nasty home video or took pictures -- £15</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">34. Had a threesome -- £50</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">35. Had sex in public -- £20</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">36. Been in the same room while someone was having sex --£25</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">37. Stole something worth over more than a hundred quid -- £20</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">38. Had sex with someone 10 years older -- £20</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">39. Had sex with someone ten years younger -- £25</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">40. Been in love with two people or more at the same time-- £50</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">41. Said you love someone but didn't mean it -- £25</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">42. Went streaking -- £5</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;"></span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">How much do u owe?</span><br /><br />I owe £430... damn!!!!... Actually I'm going to reduce it to £405... I didn't meet them via fb so fb doesnt count jare!<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Ash: I'm still wating oooooooooo!</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Shubby Doo: LOL. Night Ash</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Ash: Sweet dreams</span>Shubby Doohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739382022583876470noreply@blogger.com30tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5595822356628502752.post-81484187357842819742009-11-10T00:07:00.008+00:002010-02-07T00:48:09.982+00:00sweet november<span style="color:#c0c0c0;">‘What a difference a day makes<br />Twenty four little hours…<br />…What a difference a day made<br />And the difference is…’</span><br /><br />er… the difference is ME!<br /><br />*Singing & Dancing*<br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">‘...As you see me so<br />Edumare don bless me oh...’</span><br /><br />I’ve changed but yet I’m still me. The clock struck 12 midnight a few minutes ago and thus rang in my birthday. My only tradition for years, on the day, is popping on a destiny’s child single called <span style="color:#993300;"><span style="color:#cc6600;">‘birthday’</span> </span>from their first album…<br /><br />*Singing*<br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">‘It’s your birthday you have to do nothing’</span>… er… except go to work!!!<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Good Shepherd thanks for all the mountains you've moved so I could have another today.<br /></span><span style="font-size:0;"><span style="font-size:0;"></span></span><br /><br /><object width="560" height="340"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/Z__FHAG1Jk8&hl=en_GB&fs=1&"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/Z__FHAG1Jk8&hl=en_GB&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="560" height="340"></embed></object>Shubby Doohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739382022583876470noreply@blogger.com23tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5595822356628502752.post-70409256284512505172009-09-28T13:41:00.003+01:002009-10-02T16:39:27.579+01:00who stole the car?<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_2PUOqEeBF3U/SsCvVQOxr6I/AAAAAAAAARg/UHk948ODyfw/s1600-h/555byvpqk2l3[1].jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 221px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 166px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5386497934004170658" border="0" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_2PUOqEeBF3U/SsCvVQOxr6I/AAAAAAAAARg/UHk948ODyfw/s400/555byvpqk2l3%5B1%5D.jpg" /></a>Shubby Doohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739382022583876470noreply@blogger.com24tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5595822356628502752.post-17166789031759422382009-08-27T16:09:00.015+01:002009-08-28T14:53:27.592+01:00orisirisiI love the fact that as human being we have the free will to choose to do something. This is usually preceeded by some consideration of the merits (or demerits) of numerous options before selecting a course of action.<br /><br />I remember a quote from one of Neale Donald Walsch's books... <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">‘Every decision you make—every decision—is not a decision about what to do. It’s a decision about Who You Are’</span>. I guess that's why the thought process behind the decision is also an important one.<br /><br />Making a choice is itself a problem as the there is no way to always determine all the actual resulting outcomes it causes. So all causes have a beginning… actually, in truth, all causes are the beginning because <span style="color:#cc6600;">for every cause there is an effect</span>.<br /><br />On Tuesday night, I instinctively chose to pick up the ringing phone in my hotel room as I was aimlessly surfing the internet. On the line, was one of the Principals I worked for; however, he wasn't calling to discuss tomorrow’s meeting, instead he wanted to know if I would say yes to his gesture which was supposedly innocent but actually sheepishly disguised.<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">His choice: Engaging in pretence to get me into a comprising position…</span><br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">My choice: Pondering the rationale behind his stupid behaviour after my initial repulse…</span><br /><br />I politely declined as I had already watched the film <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">‘The Departed’.</span><br /><br />Maybe he thought I would eventually depart from my senses and that is why he chose to continue in hope; after all hope is the quintessential human delusion... or peharps he was under the illusion that if he persisted I would realise that I had no other choice but to agree to what he was proposing because as my Principal Consultant, he was the one with the authority.<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">My reaction: Indignation!<br /></span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">His reaction: Embarrassment!</span><br /><br />Can someone please give a valid reason as to why in hell I would leave my hotel room for a married man’s room to perch on his bed at 10:45pm under the pretext of watching a DVD?<br /><br />No… I didn’t think so!<br /><br />Mscheeeeeeeeeeeeew!!!Shubby Doohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739382022583876470noreply@blogger.com37tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5595822356628502752.post-49287018840307954732009-07-24T01:42:00.015+01:002009-08-31T18:21:28.373+01:00la saucisseI was 14.<br /><br />On a school trip.<br /><br />Somehow sex seemed to be everywhere.<br /><br />The night before, we had come across soft porn on television in the hotel room. I recoiled in horror, thinking <span style="color:#cc6600;">I must be in the wrong picture</span>... only for me to look out of our balcony to see two gay men having sex on theirs.<br /><br />C'est Paris. C'est la vie.<br /><br />Luckily, the next day was going to be all about <span style="color:#cc6600;">Euro Disney </span>(or is it Disneyland Paris now?)... it was strictly PG13 stuff... <span style="color:#cc6600;">Mickey Mouse</span>... <span style="color:#cc6600;">Minnie Mouse</span>… <span style="color:#cc6600;">Daffy Duck</span>… <span style="color:#cc6600;">Snow white and the Seven Dwarfs</span>… <span style="color:#cc6600;">Goofy</span>… <span style="color:#cc6600;">Cinderella</span>… <span style="color:#cc6600;">Belle and the Beast</span>… but in truth I was just excited to see <span style="color:#cc6600;">Looney Tunes’</span> finest… <span style="color:#cc6600;">Bugs Bunny</span>…<br /><br />On our way to the <span style="color:#cc6600;">theme park</span>, I suddenly found my gaze drawn away from the chatter of girls around me.<br /><br />I looked out of the window.<br /><br />I’m not sure what I expected to see... definitely not a man driving erratically near our coach. At first I was afraid. Then I was confused. I kept wondering why he kept throwing glances at coach full of pubescent girls and laughing hysterically; the apparent cause of his bad driving.<br /><br />A small gasp escaped from my lips as he took one hand off the wheel and lowered it. I knew now that it wasn’t me that was crazy, just him.<br /><br />Vidya saw my expression and stopped, mid conversation. ‘Girl, what’s wrong?’, she questioned as she leaned over to nudge me. Then she was staring too. Others that had observed our abrupt silence, got up to look out of the window; only to be confronted by the same feeling of disbelief and discomfort.<br /><br />Which was due to?<br /><br />The simply fact that the man had whipped out his <span style="color:#cc6600;">wiener</span>… and then proceeded to knead his soft <span style="color:#cc6600;">sausage</span>... moist.<br /><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Jigger, fellers</span>.<br /><br />It was the first time I had seen one in real life… reddish/purple… swollen… & erect...<br /><br />I turned my head away. My throat felt dry and tight as I swallowed hard.<br /><br />At our destination, I tried to push his image to the back of my mind as we were given instructions of when and where we were to meet periodically throughout the day. Soon I was completely distracted of all thoughts that had nothing to do with fun as we hurried to queue for <span style="color:#cc6600;">ride</span> after <span style="color:#cc6600;">ride</span>; completely intent on enjoying every attraction at the <span style="color:#cc6600;">theme park</span>.<br /><br />Before long, we realised it was time for lunch. After deciding where to eat, we made our way into the food counter. My nausea re-surfaced at the sight of the menu. Not one to miss a thing, Vidya started laughing as she collected her order and said ‘<span style="color:#c0c0c0;">What up prune-face</span>? Aren’t you going to order? Go on... I dare you’. Then just before she took a big bite out of her ready meal, she continued in her best <span style="color:#cc6600;">René </span>accent, ‘<span style="color:#c0c0c0;">allo allo… ze flashing knobs... is zat's vot it's all about?</span>’.<br /><br />I eyed her and hissed.<br /><br />Then I turned back to the counter and ordered. ‘Les frites, s'il vous plait. C'est ça’.<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Hotdogs</span> were simply off my menu…Shubby Doohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739382022583876470noreply@blogger.com32tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5595822356628502752.post-55808151830350251742009-06-25T23:57:00.001+01:002010-02-07T07:21:31.710+00:00remember the timeIn my hotel room in Manchester, I hear that <span style="color:#cc6600;">Michael Jackson</span> is in hospital... suffering from cardiac arrest...within minutes Sky News changes it breaking news to say there is an unconfirmed report from <a href="http://www.tmz.com/2009/06/25/michael-jackson-dies-death-dead-cardiac-arrest/"><span style="color:#990000;">TMZ </span></a>that he is <span style="color:#cc6600;">dead</span>.<br /><br />I sit up in disbelief. I'm feeling weak... sick to my stomach... just like the time I found out that Princess Diana had died; another person whose end was tragic... in my mind both gave so much in life.<br /><br />My phone rings... it's Niata calling from Nigeria, crying.<br /><br />My blackberry starts singing again... and again... and again... I check... more new messages about <span style="color:#cc6600;">Michael Jackson</span>...<br /><br />On facebook I see only one new status update... then I see another... then another... I add my own status update to facebook... more and more are updated as each minute passes.... many saying <span style="color:#cc6600;">RIP MJ</span>... some saying <span style="color:#cc6600;">MJ</span> is just in hospital... others saying don't kill him with your mouth... and one saying he's not dead until CNN says so... so I start to hope again... why? because it is the quintessentially human.<br /><br />Then LA Times confirm he is gone...and finally CNN do too.<br /><br />I keep watching the news; then <span style="color:#cc6600;">memories</span> of him...<span style="color:#c0c0c0;">HIStor</span><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">y</span>... his songs... come flooding into my mind...<br /><br />I <span style="color:#cc6600;">remember</span> watching <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Thriller </span>through my fingers as a child and being scared shitless... I <span style="color:#cc6600;">remember</span> <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Billie Jean</span>, <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Beat It</span>, <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Wanna be Starting Something</span>... I <span style="color:#cc6600;">remember</span> trying to do the moonwalk after watching Motown 25 and failing miserably. To be honest, one of the actual reasons I started learning ballet at the age of 9 was because I wanted to be an <span style="color:#cc6600;">En Pointe</span> dancer... there was nothing cooler than being able to stand up on your toes... it was <span style="color:#cc6600;">MJ's</span> signature move!!!<br /><br />I <span style="color:#cc6600;">remember</span> <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Bad</span>... especially, how badly I wanted to be like Tatiana Thumbtzen who featured in his music video for <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">The Way You Make Me Feel</span>. I <span style="color:#cc6600;">remember</span> trying to spot the stars/celebrities littered in his <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Liberian Girl </span>music video... all the time forgetting that I hadn't seen Micheal Jackson until the very end. I <span style="color:#cc6600;">remember</span> his other songs like <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Man in the Mirror</span>, <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Dirty Diana</span>, <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">I Just Can't Stop Loving You</span> and of course that famous anti gravity lean in the music video for <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Smooth Criminal</span>...<br /><br />Please who can forget his epic song <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">We Are the World</span>?... not me... never me...<br /><br />What about his songs from the <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Dangerous</span> Album?... <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Black or White</span> ... OMG, I <span style="color:#cc6600;">remember</span> Maizah trying to teach a whole bunch of us at boarding school the dance moves in the music video <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Remember the Time</span>. I <span style="color:#cc6600;">remember </span>Naomi Campbell in <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">In the Closet</span> as well as Michael Jordon in <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Jam</span>... I <span style="color:#cc6600;">remembe</span><span style="color:#cc6600;">r </span>waiting endlessly to watch the UK music video exlcusive of<span style="color:#c0c0c0;"> </span><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Who Is It</span> on TV and then thinking chai... na wa for billionaire's boys club escort agency o!!!... I <span style="color:#cc6600;">remember</span> re-playing his song <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Will You Be There</span>… I played that song over and over again in my dorm room in school so I could learn the lyrics.<br /><br />I <span style="color:#cc6600;">remember</span> crying to his <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Heal</span> <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">the World</span> song... I <span style="color:#cc6600;">remember</span> his song <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Gone Too Soon</span>. *sighs* ... at only 50 years old... isn't that just the truth?!<br /><br />I <span style="color:#cc6600;">remember</span> the amazing visual effects in the <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Scream</span> music video when it was released... just watching Janet Jackson and her older brother left me in complete awe... funnily enough, I only just watched that same video on some music channel about 2 weeks ago and still thought it to be awesome.<br /><br />I <span style="color:#cc6600;">remember</span> smiling as I watched Michael Jackson's Scarecrow <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Ease on down the Road</span> with Diana Ross's Dorothy in the film <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">'The Wiz'</span>.<br /><br />I will always <span style="color:#cc6600;">remember the time</span> I found out that <span style="color:#cc6600;">Michael Jackson died</span>.<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">RIP Michael Jackson</span>... your legacy lives on... know your music was the greatest... it touched so many... the man in the mirror made that change... I'm forever your fan... even though you are gone and I can no longer <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Rock With You</span>... know still... <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">You Rock My World</span>.<br /><br /><br /><embed height="344" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="425" src="http://www.youtube.com/v/aQm4XXEgZoY&hl=" fs="1" allowfullscreen="true" allowscriptaccess="always"></embed>Shubby Doohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739382022583876470noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5595822356628502752.post-71179857515874737842009-06-24T08:18:00.000+01:002009-06-27T13:29:44.027+01:00jimmy chooJimmy Choo is coming to H&M...apologies in advance to all those I'ma elbow outta my way to get a pair...or two pairs...or three pairs...needs must!!!Shubby Doohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739382022583876470noreply@blogger.com14tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5595822356628502752.post-89989885702358500382009-06-17T10:20:00.059+01:002009-07-26T22:05:25.028+01:00lord of warThat should probably read <span style="color:#cc6600;">'Lords of Wars'</span>... becos both don plenty pass o! Apologies for my absence but I’ve dealing with too many family issues these past weeks… it’s been really HARD keeping up appearances because I just want to explode… family politics is just the shits!… all this because everybody in the <span style="color:#cc6600;">House of Agbada Daggers</span> seems content to <span style="color:#cc6600;">‘just throw one's toys out of the pram’</span>… honestly the nursery is in a right <span style="color:#cc6600;">royal mess</span>.<br /><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">‘Always resort to your native tongue in times of anger. And in times of ecstasy’</span><br />Really?! Ok sha but na pidgin I go use because e be like say <span style="color:#cc6600;">dis mosquito na malaria</span> o!!!... *SMDH*... so make I yarn my tory now make una fit understand wetin dey do me abi?<br /><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">‘The problem with gun runners going to war, is that there is no shortage of ammunition’</span><br />Na true talk be dat o! You see wen<span style="color:#cc6600;"> money miss road</span> go make mouth… anoda one go make yeye yab am finish… I no even fit support am… who tell am say make he dey carry woman up and down.<br /><br />Instead wey make chuku chuku<span style="color:#cc6600;"> pour water for fire</span> he go dey side with cry baby… chuku chuku one no even vex me jare… everybody don know say na corner corner dat one dey do pass… me, I wan laugh wen I hear say he dey tell person make dem <span style="color:#cc6600;">chop bullet</span> everytime he wan land... na wa o! Abi him too wan come say all of us no sabi dat na woman wrapper dey do both of dem... from time!!!... mscheeww.<br /><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">‘The first and most important rule of gunrunning is, never get shot with your own merchandise.’</span><br />Wen I see say wahala dey ground, I come say make I try talk small... sotai I talk say na <span style="color:#cc6600;">condition dey make crayfish bend</span>… say make we <span style="color:#cc6600;">open eye for compound</span> make arm robber no enter… dem no wan hear word… say make I carry go... Na so I come see say dem fit <span style="color:#cc6600;">chook me</span> too o!... so me sef I kuku comot for road jejely make dey no use my own join am…<br /><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">‘They say, "Evil prevails when good men fail to act." What they ought to say is, "Evil prevails."’<br /></span>From nowhere dem come face gorimpka cry blood… say make he carry dey go… ehnnn? Becos why?! Why dem dey do like <span style="color:#cc6600;">fool don pass garri</span>? Please help me beg o!… I no even sabi how he enter wahala with dem… but e be like say na becos he no wan put eye dia.<br /><br />Fear catch me no be small sha wen I hear dat one sha… mind tell me say make I rush go collect am cos e no even get money enter molue or machine or carbu carbu…<br /><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">‘You know who's going to inherit the Earth? Arms dealers. Because everyone else is too busy killing each other. That's the secret to survival. Never go to war.’</span><br />Wen I reach, see am tanda dia, I tell say make he dey come. Na so moro moro come dey talk <span style="color:#cc6600;">tory wey get many leg</span>… dat pololo own no be de only one wey dey for ground... dat na <span style="color:#cc6600;">kill and divide</span> cry baby dey do since... say we just dey think say na fren fren dey do am but e be like say chuku chuku wan use style <span style="color:#cc6600;">take garri from all our mouth</span>… say im don see say serious wahala already dey for ground already... dat na why he no wan <span style="color:#cc6600;">put fire</span> for dis talk... he just dey try patch am.<br /><br />I just siddon dey look am…I no even fit find mouth talk again… e be like say <span style="color:#cc6600;">bad belle</span> don plenty o!... <span style="color:#cc6600;">today na today</span>... abi na craze?!!!...*sighs*…<br /><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">‘They say that I am the lord of war, but perhaps it is you.’<br /></span>Make I talk true... before before na me dem dey face... as per, if trouble dey na my name dem go first call... dis time sha, I'm truly trying to help where I can even though I don't do stress... this time, <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">‘I am a man of peace; but when I speak, they are for war.’ Psalm 120:6-7</span>... their irrational human behaviour is just beyond me... so much so, they ALL make me want to SCREAM!!!<br /><br />Honestly, man pickin don tire!... for now I wash my hands of all the nonesense jare…<br /><br />p.s<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Good Shepherd</span> abeg no vex but needs must… <span style="color:#cc6600;">man no die, man no rotten</span>. I know you understand.Shubby Doohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739382022583876470noreply@blogger.com21tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5595822356628502752.post-47174423690803563382009-05-30T07:49:00.017+01:002009-06-07T18:31:03.160+01:00364 days at Peking<span style="color:#c0c0c0;">‘…A Squash vine grew beneath a towering tree.<br />In only twenty days it grew and spread and put forth fruit.<br />Of the tree it asked: 'How old are you? How many years?'<br />Replied the tree: 'Two hundred it would be, and surely more.'<br />The squash laughed and said: 'Look, in twenty days, I've done<br />More than you; tell me, why are you so slow?'<br />The tree responded: 'O little Squash, today is not the day of<br />reckoning between the two of us'<br />'Tomorrow, when winds of autumn howl down on you and me, then shall it be known for sure which one of us is the most resilient…’<br /><br />Nasir Khusraw<br /></span><br />Above is how I started my very <a href="http://shubbydoo.blogspot.com/2008/06/what-is-on-us-is-from-us.html"><span style="color:#990000;">first post</span></a>.<br /><br />I've stayed in this foreign land for almost a year... a year on 1st June to be exact.<br /><br />I have met many new friends on this <span style="color:#cc6600;">‘journey’</span>... including a blogger quite dear to me... better known to all here as <a href="http://allied-genesis.blogspot.com/"><span style="color:#990000;">Allied</span></a>... I had the pleasure of meeting her about two weeks ago on my trip to USA.<br /><br />You have met <span style="color:#cc6600;">Shubby Doo</span> and <span style="color:#cc6600;">Flying Snow</span>.<br /><br />Here, I have tried to hold true to the fact that I never wanted this to be my <span style="color:#cc6600;">‘</span><span style="color:#cc6600;">boxer rebellion’</span> despite the fact that this in itself is a secret society. This escape has been somewhat of a <span style="color:#cc6600;">‘battle’ </span>because unlike <span style="color:#cc6600;">‘the boxers’</span>, I have constantly worried that this incarnation of me would not be impervious to blades or invincible against the <span style="color:#cc6600;">‘fire spears’</span> of foreigners<br /><br />Despite my fears, in this <span style="color:#cc6600;">‘Peking’</span>, I have tried to stay true to myself.<br /><br />Have I succeeded? I guess only <span style="color:#cc6600;">The Good Shepherd</span> truly knows :-)<br /><br />So for the simply fact that in 364 days I never actually chose to <span style="color:#cc6600;">‘escape from Peking to Xian’</span>, I'm going to celebrate this occasion by saying <span style="color:#cc6600;">‘</span><span style="color:#cc6600;">Happy 1 year anniversary’</span> to this blogspot.<br /><br />Blogville has been a rich experience to remember...Shubby Doohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739382022583876470noreply@blogger.com27tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5595822356628502752.post-68661862867412753592009-05-04T18:42:00.022+01:002010-02-27T17:46:13.965+00:00may days<span style="color:#cc6600;">May Day</span> conjures up a time when the weather is warmer… flowers start to blossom... just like friendships. Yesterday, I went to <a href="http://www.iamshona.com/"><span style="color:#990000;">ShonaVixen’s</span></a> for lunch and also met up with <a href="http://afrolicious-babe.blogspot.com/"><span style="color:#990000;">Afrobabe</span></a>, <a href="http://confessionsofalondongal.blogspot.com/"><span style="color:#990000;">Confessions of a London gal</span></a>, <a href="http://jaylalicious.blogspot.com/"><span style="color:#990000;">Jayla</span></a> and <a href="http://wherewordsaresold.blogspot.com/"><span style="color:#990000;">Wordmerchant</span></a>… all for the first time... I don’t think any of us left hers before 11:30pm... I had a fab time... ladies, it was simply a pleasure.<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">May</span> is also the time that falls approximately halfway between the spring equinox and summer solstice... a time for love and romance. Well just in case cupid has decided to take time off as <span style="color:#cc6600;">Labour Day</span>… I’m off too… <span style="color:#cc6600;">Flying Snow</span> will be living it up <span style="color:#cccccc;">James Bond</span> style... lol... ok, not quite but I do have three trips planned; two of which are holidays... so be it for work or play... I'm calling these <span style="color:#cc6600;">escapades</span> my <span style="color:#cc6600;">May Days</span>.<br /><br />So let me tell you about where I will be and see if you can guess... feel free to also let me know your reasoning :-)<br /><br />The 1st holiday is mid month… with Tweet… and guess what?!!!… we are planning on going skydiving again!!! So I guess this is the <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">‘Live and Let Die’</span> holiday… while there, I will visit places where the Hudson divides. At some point I will become its girl but hopefully not its devil...<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Where am I?<br />Caribbean<br />Jamaica<br />USA</span><br /><br />The 2nd holiday is the weekend after… and it’s with Niata and Cameron… we are exploring two countries…<br /><br />Initially, Niata and I will fly to the crossroads of the Pannonian Plain. Cameron will join us later as we explore a greek, roman, venetian and austro-hungarian schizoid that managed to capture the sea journeys of Dragonheart… this country features in the film <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">‘From Russia with Love’</span> although we will not be in Russia…<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Where am I?<br />Croatia<br />Italy<br />Serbia<br />Turkey</span><br /><br />Cameron, Niata and I will drive across the boarder to another country; previously ruled by bishop princes but now known as the Monaco of the Adriatic. Consider this as our <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">‘Casino Royale’</span> break away…<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Where am I?<br />Bahamas<br />Czech Republic<br />Italy<br />Montenegro<br />Pakistan<br />Uganda<br />USA<br /></span><br />I get back on the Wednesday and from then on it will be all work again… you see first thing on Thursday, I have to drive to Manchester for a conference… Friday morning, I’ll drive back down south at a leisurely pace; heading straight for work. On Saturday, I fly out for a week … I'm giving no clues on this one I'm afraid so feel free to just guess... but bear in mind that what they say is true… <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">‘The World Is Not Enough’</span>…<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Where am I?<br />Azerbaijan<br />Kazakhstan<br />Spain<br />Turkey </span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;"></span><br />Oh Happy Days!<br /><br />p.s<br />To the five ladies mentioned above, as well as <a href="http://www.rocnaija.com/"><span style="color:#990000;">Rocnaija</span></a>, you are allowed to comment but not about the locations... I know that you know ;-)<br /><br />pp.s<br />Disobey me and I will attack the blogroll!!!Shubby Doohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739382022583876470noreply@blogger.com53tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5595822356628502752.post-90627372766952915472009-04-17T13:09:00.041+01:002009-04-18T10:44:47.609+01:00fair is foul and foul is fair<span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Resturant, London. August 2006<br /></span><span style="color:#cc6600;">‘I wish I could pay for lunch but you know I’m not working.’</span><br />So I Paid.<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">‘He likes you but I want you to know that he invited me over to his place but I didn’t go. I said it was because my mother is in town.’<br /></span>So I shook my head.<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;"><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Café, London. August 2006</span> </span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">‘OMG, I told him and his friend that you were seeing someone but he had no right to call you in anger about it. I’m happy you told him off.’</span><br />So I sighed.<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">‘He and I got talking and I think we clicked. Maybe I understand him more than you do.’ </span><br />So I nodded in agreement.<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">‘That night, he walked me home and we had this moment where we nearly kissed.’<br /></span>So I choked back the laughter and smiled.<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">‘I found out that he and Terry slept together that night that he walked me home. He went back for her. She knew he liked me. What a bitch!!!’<br /></span>So I sympathised.<br /><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Work. September 2006</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">‘Come with me to Lyon. It’s my friend’s wedding.’</span><br />So I agreed.<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">‘It’s not that I cannot afford it but can’t you book my ticket with your air miles?’</span><br />So I made up an excuse and declined.<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">‘Well I told him we were going on holiday but I don’t know why he’d want to call you last night.’</span><br />So I told her it was to wish me journey’s mercies.<br /><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Airport, London. October 2006</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">‘The airline didn’t fly my luggage out on my flight.’<br /></span>So I confirmed that it was on my flight and called her back.<br /><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Airport, Lyon. October 2006</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">‘You know that calling you about my luggage finished my credit’.</span><br />So I told her about roaming charges.<br /><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Hotel, Lyon. October 2006</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">‘I know we are sharing but are you going to pay for the hotel for both nights?’<br /></span>So I said no and watched as she begrudgingly paid for the second night.<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">‘Thanks for letting me use your phone. I</span><span style="color:#cc6600;"> was going to call my brother because I need credit but I can’t get through. I am going to call Cee Cee to help me top up my credit. She is the one true friend I can rely on.’</span><br />So I rolled my eyes.<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">‘I am running so late. I thought we had plenty of time. I can’t believe I didn’t re-set the time when I arrived in Lyon. I’ll just jump in the shower and then we can go.’</span><br />So I waited.<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;"><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Train Station, Lyon. October 2006</span> </span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">‘The train is too crowded. The next one will be too late to make the wedding. It isn’t worth going there just for the reception. Oh well I tried. It’s her fault for not sorting out things properly for the wedding.’</span><br />So I kept quiet.<br /><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Resturant, Lyon. October 2006</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">‘Who is calling you? Is it him?’</span><br />So I showed her that it was.<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">‘He is being a real asshole. I’m so done with him.’</span><br />So I frowned, knowing full well that she wasn’t.<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">‘Do me a favour and delete his number so I won’t be tempted to ask you for it.’</span><br />So I deleted it because I knew she didn’t want me calling him.<br /><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Hotel, Lyon. October 2006</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">‘I can’t find my money. I can't understand where it could have gone’</span><br />So I showed her my purse only contained plastic money.<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">‘Let me tell you something. It's not nice to hear you go on about stuff you've bought when I don't have money.’</span><br />So I stared at her in disbelief and then walked out to cure my blues with more retail therapy.<br /><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">In the car, London. January 2007</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Maizah: Shubby Doo, do you know that even though he refuses to date her publicly, she still cooks for him every week, packs it in plastic and carries the food to his house.<br />Shubby Doo: The whole thing is off but I’ve told her I want no part in the friendship she has with him. </span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Maizah: You know Hafizah has been bitching about you behind your back; that she can’t talk to you about him.<br />Shubby Doo: She is at his house now. She told me not to tell you. Sad thing is it is not us she is fooling but herself. She will be her own undoing. </span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Maizah: You know we fought about you. I told her that she was out of order about the things she was saying.<br />Shubby Doo: I’m not surprised at her at all. Please o!...What has she been saying?<br />Maizah: Things like you finished her cash in Lyon.<br />Shubby Doo: Hahaha…abeg what cash?!!! I'm always picking up the tab. I simply stood my ground about the hotel. She has been bitching about you too. Apparently, you have an attitude problem because you argue with her anyhow and don’t give her the respect she deserves as she is 2 years your senior. I was like haba...relax!!! I mean I know we all went to school together but you guys are family friends... despite all her nonsense nobody has Hafizah's back like you do Maizah.<br /></span><span style="color:#cc6600;">Maizah: I guess <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Macbeth's</span> witches were right; </span><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">‘...fair is foul and foul is fair...’<br /></span><br />So we laughed.Shubby Doohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739382022583876470noreply@blogger.com49tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5595822356628502752.post-3649806208261933442009-03-23T10:23:00.036+00:002009-05-04T19:47:20.250+01:00inglorious basterdsThis is the story of my encounter with the <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">‘Inglorious Basterds’</span>… no I haven’t spelt it incorrectly but should I choose later to follow the original mantra forged by <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Enzo Castellari</span>, I will change the title of this post to <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">‘quel maledetto treno blindato’</span>. For now I have simply chosen to phrase it as <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Quentin Tarantino</span> has =)<br /><br />Anyway... as I was saying... I’ve always done my best to avoid <span style="color:#cc6600;">‘quel maledetto treno blindato’</span> but as I surfed the internet, trying to figure out the hoops I needed to jump through to get a new naija passport, I realised that I needed to ride <span style="color:#cc6600;">‘that</span><span style="color:#cc6600;"> damned armoured train’</span> to get it...<br /><br />Mind you, McAfee warned me sha... it warned me well well that the site was not recommended for my computer... <span style="color:#cc6600;">‘harmful’</span> it said... McAfee even posted a big red cross on the pop up screen as it begged me not to proceed onwards towards <span style="color:#cc6600;">‘<span style="color:#cc6600;">the voyage of </span>damned’</span>.<br /><br />But I needed a new naija passport... so I decided to scoff out loud as I thought to myself ‘these oyinbos don come again… norring do me jare’<br /><br />I mean I’m very used to hearing such aspersions against Nigeria… but this was aimed against an official system operating in the UK… it felt at least over exaggerated if not untrue...<br /><br />Suddenly McAfee’s advice felt similar to that of the Foreign and Commonwealths Office’s (FCO’s) current travel advice on my beloved country in sub-saharan Africa ‘…we advise against all travel to the Niger Delta States of Bayelsa, Delta and Rivers (including Port Harcourt)’.<br /><br />Hahahaha... shebi <a href="http://unorthodoxdecorum.blogspot.com/"><span style="color:#990000;">Baroque</span></a> still dey Port Harcourt kampe... shebi all dis time dem neva kidnap am for ransom... so wetin be dis one again?<br /><br />So as I am sat there at my computer, I basically start to ponder on the variety of infractions working against the reputation of my beloved naija... I also started to try to figure out wherein lay the real threat.<br /><br />I reasoned that as an official nigerian website in foreign territory, it would be well fortified and definitely trustworthy… I mean why would the webpage for the Nigerian High Commission in London use the same stratagem that allowed the Greeks to finally enter the city of <span style="color:#cc6600;">Troy</span> during the <span style="color:#cc6600;">Trojan War</span> against me?… I was one of its own… I wasn’t fighting against them…<br /><br />On the flip side, I also reasoned that McAfee had never been wrong… but what choice did I have? I needed a new passport as I planned to be in Lagos for Easter…<br /><br />So I clicked to proceed and entered the website… soon after which, I quickly recognised the <span style="color:#cc6600;">‘bastardi senza gloria’</span>…<br /><br />They were the ones that used computer code with military precision to try and target my precious hardware… they were the ones that arrived with malware hidden inside NOT ONE BUT FOUR <span style="color:#cc6600;">Trojan Horses</span> that were hurled at the gates of my firewall as soon as I opened the webpage.<br /><br />Please o!... help me beg... why?!<br /><br />Why would the NHC want to have unauthorized access to my machine to save their files? Why would the NHC want to control my computer or view my screen?<br /><br />While I sat there stunned in utter disbelief, McAfee wasted no time in disposing of all four Trojans.<br /><br />So for now, my <span style="color:#cc6600;">Troy</span> still stands proud.<br /><br />You’d think I’d have shut it down and left straight away right?<br /><br />Wrong!<br /><br />I figured that since I was there (and seemingly able to withstand the attacks) I might as well carry on with my reconnaissance mission and find out about payment too… I find what I'm looking for... but not utterly sure that I fully understand what I'm seeing, I click on the link for the application process and get re-directed to the Nigerian Immigration Service... fees on the NIS website are listed as 8,750 NGN with InterSwitch payments or 110 USD with Google payments<br /><br />My head wanted to scatter as it reworked the nonsensical numbers again and again… in the end all I could think to myself was abeg which kain ojoro be dis again? 110 USD roughly equates to 16,245 NGN... and that's not even the black market rate o!!!<br /><br />I wanted to laugh out loud this time... but all I could resort to doing was <span style="color:#cc6600;">SMDH</span>.<br /><br />I know say I for no use correct English again to yab these wayo masters but<span style="color:#cc6600;"> damn it</span> all that comes to mind is:<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">‘Inglorious Bastards’</span>.Shubby Doohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739382022583876470noreply@blogger.com59tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5595822356628502752.post-49858854159307802762009-03-16T00:50:00.010+00:002009-06-07T18:40:55.150+01:00happiness is egg shapedI’m hiding behind angels<br />A little frightened<br />But already numb to the pain<br /><br />I go into hospital today<br />For treatment<br />Pre-cancerous cells the letter said<br /><br />I say<br />It is not cancer<br />It is not cancer<br />It is not cancer<br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">‘…keep your kiss of death</span><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">'Cause I choose glory, yeah.’<br /></span><br />I called my friend yesterday to talk it through<br />Why?<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Respice Finem</span><br />She allayed my fears<br />The Doctor tells me it s quite normal to be abnormal<br /><br />My advice to you ladies is get smear tests done reguarly<br />Is it every 3 or 5 years they recommend?<br />I can't quite remember<br /><br />I do know<br />That I am calm<br />That I am and have always been blessed<br />So I am still able to smile and laugh in the here and now<br />I cherish that<br /><br />So like I said I’ll head out for treatment in a couple of hours... going there with the Good Shepherd =)Shubby Doohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739382022583876470noreply@blogger.com31tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5595822356628502752.post-75750394050208428522009-03-04T15:33:00.033+00:002009-04-04T16:52:59.773+01:00ciaoThere are so many different ways to say it so I will only cover a few below:<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Goodbye</span> - English<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Slán</span> - Irish<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Hwyl fawr</span> - Welsh<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Au Revoir</span> or <span style="color:#cc6600;">à bientôt</span> - French<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Auf Wiedersehen</span> - German<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Adiós</span> or <span style="color:#cc6600;">hasta la vista</span> - Spanish<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Adieus</span> - Portuguese<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Ciao</span> or <span style="color:#cc6600;">arrivederci</span> - Italian<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Yasou</span> or <span style="color:#cc6600;">andio</span> - Greek<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Näkemiin</span> - Finnish<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Dag</span> or <span style="color:#cc6600;">Tot ziens</span> - Dutch<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Hejdå</span> - Swedish<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Farvel</span> - Danish<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Żegnaj</span> - Polish<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Poka</span> or <span style="color:#cc6600;">Пока</span> - Russian<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Shalom</span> - Hebrew<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Ma'a al Salama</span> - Arabic<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Sayonara</span> - Japanese<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Zai Jian</span> or <span style="color:#cc6600;">再见</span>- Chinese<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Paalam</span> - Filipino<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Sampai Jumpa</span> - Indonesian<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Namaste</span> - Hindi... funny because <span style="color:#cc6600;">Namaste</span> is also the same word for hello in Hindi :-)<br /><br />So I got this text message on Sunday from my razz cousin... who I am really holding back from doing a post on because it will always be one done in anger... her own is just to try and con me out of money and for that reason I haven't seen her in years... not since she begged me to give her some serious cash (which I did); only for me to realise her plan was always to abscond back to Nigeria the very same day she got it from me... no wahala sha but my own is <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">once bitten, twice shy</span>... *sighs*...<br /><br />Anyway I got her text and I started to laugh… so much so I couldn’t stop.<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Farida: Hope u are good? Just checking on u. Call me! CHAO.</span><br /><br />ROTFLMFAO… abeg which one be chao?… kai! I want to believe that it was a slip of the finger… simply a typo… but I have learnt otherwise with her… yarning with her for 5 minutes is pure hard work… she be village girl o! but dat one no concern am because she go just dey blow her own <span style="color:#cc6600;">phonetics</span> by fire and by force.<br /><br />Please why do people just continue to <span style="color:#cc6600;">bastardise a language</span> in an effort to feel among?<br /><br />SMDH<br /><br />What the hell was wrong with just saying <span style="color:#cc6600;">o da bo</span>?!!!Shubby Doohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739382022583876470noreply@blogger.com41tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5595822356628502752.post-44852388681995120022009-02-16T22:21:00.028+00:002009-02-17T07:42:55.727+00:00black swanSo I’m reading a book called <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">The Black Swan</span>; a novel written by <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Nassim Nicholas Taleb</span>. Its premise is the big <span style="color:#cc6600;">uncertainty</span> that people never take account of… one that is never <span style="color:#cc6600;">mitigated</span> for… one that no <span style="color:#cc6600;">contingency</span> is set aside to take care of… simply because living in a box prevents us from thinking outside of it. As a result, society has conditioned us to very rarely <span style="color:#cc6600;">factor</span> in any <span style="color:#cc9933;"><span style="color:#cc6600;">uncertainty</span> </span>associated with <span style="color:#cc6600;">black swans</span> into any of our <span style="color:#cc6600;">evaluations</span>.<br /><br />People used to think that all swans were white… it was what was once known to be true so during that time one would have been ridiculed beyond humiliation for even daring to think otherwise… that is… until a <span style="color:#cc6600;">black swan</span> was sighted.<br /><br />An <span style="color:#cc6600;">unassailable belief</span>, eventually disproved has three attributes: firstly, it is rooted in the realm of regular expectations; secondly, there is an extreme impact associated with the realisation that the belief no longer holds true; and lastly, there is a need for a concocted explanation that fits. The third is necessary… why?... simply because people do not like the unknown… I guess it is comforting to think that everything can still fit neatly inside the box they choose to live in.<br /><br />Like I said in the <a href="http://shubbydoo.blogspot.com/2008/07/house-of-agbada-daggers.html"><span style="color:#990000;">house of agbada daggers</span></a>, this is my look inward through an enclosure of boundless space. This weblog is what I use to capture thoughts and memories as they occur since I don’t keep a diary. The good thing about this practice is I cannot hide behind <span style="color:#cc6600;">retrospective distortion</span>… I cannot <span style="color:#cc6600;">overevaluate</span> because my ability to rationalise to a final answer is limited.<br /><br />Does it really matter that I am doing this without the full benefit of hindsight… I guess it is a condition of life that one suffers or benefits as a <span style="color:#cc6600;">consequence</span> of a series of unfolding events without never really being able to see the full picture. I hope that by writing down my <span style="color:#cc6600;">unrevised perceptions</span> that contain no <span style="color:#cc6600;">illusions of understanding</span>, I may study these events later… to be better prepared perhaps... is that even possible?!... not <span style="color:#cc6600;">absolutely</span>.<br /><br />As this is a diary of sorts, I should have started this entry with how I was feeling today…physically, I am fine… well apart from my nose… you see yesterday I decided to be lazy (by not walking over to the passenger side of my car to get my shopping) which resulted in me smashing my nose against the side frame of the car as I turned to remove the shopping bags that I had reached over to get. I swear to God I thought I heard a crack. Now how is that for <span style="color:#cc6600;">unplanned impact</span>?... lol… I laugh now but it still hurts like mad... I can breathe ok so I didn’t rush to A&E.<br /><br />So apart from that I am doing okay (the ton of assignments I have to do for the various projects I am working on don’t count).<br /><br />So now I sit in bed and type this to the still of the night. I am one that has always cherished the peace within. Yet for the past four weeks I have lain awake listening to the searching hum of your song. Why? To you I am a <span style="color:#cc6600;">black swan</span><span style="color:#cc6600;">: ‘the</span> <span style="color:#cc6600;">incomprehensible’</span> despite the fact that I try and stay as what you know.<br /><br />How I wish I could make you understand that Flying Snow is a just that part of me that dares to dream the <span style="color:#cc6600;">serendipitous</span> dreams of the <span style="color:#cc6600;">black swan</span>. Will you not dream with me? I know you are scared but try and understand that <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">people in glass houses should not throw stones</span>... our joint failing is that <span style="color:#cc6600;">‘we do not learn that we do not learn’</span>.<br /><br />I love you but I do not understand this need of yours for corroboration… as you look for strength in confirming bias based on loose concoctions; I see vulnerability. I know why you are desperate for others to see a false danger by disconfirming my establish truth… but how can that work? you were the one that taught me that my world is not flat, but round. Truth is truth.<br /><br />These past few weeks, before I laid my head to sleep, I have looked to the faith in myself and prayed, just like you taught me. I still see a world of <span style="color:#cc6600;">infinite possibilities</span>. Let me tell you of one of other marvels the <span style="color:#cc6600;">Good Shepherd</span> showed me: it was you. I saw you smiling, arms outstretched and full with your parcels; gifts of love, ever selfless.<br /><br />Your love is like nothing else: giving, insightful but it can also be lawless, crushing and unremorseful.<br /><br />You are afraid,<br />I am afraid.<br /><br />Mãe, I keep trying but you have to meet me halfway…Shubby Doohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739382022583876470noreply@blogger.com37tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5595822356628502752.post-63516019053996949022009-01-27T11:57:00.109+00:002010-02-07T07:20:11.530+00:00sex, lies &...3. chaos<p><embed height="344" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="425" src="http://www.youtube.com/v/xNQDeVis884&color1=" allowfullscreen="true" fs="1" color2="0xcfcfcf&feature="></embed><br /><br />This is a hilarious... while I 100% support Baba Suwe's beloved's mantra of <span style="color:#cc6600;">‘you gats to give, to receive’</span>... I can't stop laughing at his response.<br /><br />When I get up off the floor and the tears subside I might try and decode what Baba Suwe says here for the non yorubas... although most of the rest of this clip is sub-titled, the classic bits of his rant are not... which is great shame. Like I said I might try but as doing so will most likely cause me to collapse in a fit of laughter again, I can make no promises =)<br /><br />What I will say is one has to respect him for how he sticks to his guns with respect to what he regards as a gross act of foreplay... I doubled over as he kept repeating similar words to those sang by <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Meatloaf</span>... <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">‘</span><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">I can do anything for love but I won't do that’</span>... but his sentiments are an antonym to those of the song... LOL.<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">What Baba Suwe's girl want</span><span style="color:#cc6600;">ed:</span> Head.<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Resulting chaos:</span> Baba Suwe started ranting and raving; basically, saying <span style="color:#cc6600;">‘</span><span style="color:#cc6600;">hell no’</span>.... in the end there was no sex that night as both of them tried to make their respective points on the matter.<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Moral: There is a line that one should never be forced to cross to please another.</span><br /><br />Baba Suwe, let <span style="color:#cc6600;">katakata</span> burst jo... norring do you jare... I support your theory o! (not this particular one sha)... but I do support the idea behind it… one should never agree to do something, sexually, that makes one uncomfortable for another.<br /><br />Speaking of <span style="color:#cc6600;">chaos</span>... I will take this opportunity to do <span style="color:#cc6600;">‘</span><span style="color:#cc6600;">2 truths and 1 lie’</span>... I was tagged by <a href="http://theartofmusing.blogspot.com/"><span style="color:#990000;">Doug</span></a>. No, I will not be tagging any others or pasting the rules here... yes, I do know that it may be unwise to forego the rules or break the chain... & yes, I also understand that by purposely doing so, I may spurn the <span style="color:#cc6600;">universe's wrath</span>. Will it dash me a hard slap of <span style="color:#cc6600;">‘the butterfly effect’</span> for my disobedience?….who knows… but what I do know is that, for this, I am choosing not to give into any notion based on an <span style="color:#cc6600;">unrealistic sensitive dependence</span>. So I post this in the hope that the flapping wings of that butterfly that has just taken flight, halfway across the world, will not result in a <span style="color:#cc6600;">tornado</span> in my life; as these scenarios can themselves, already, be deemed as <span style="color:#cc6600;">salacious </span>or perhaps even <span style="color:#cc6600;">scandalous</span>. Thankfully, I can say they have been rarity in my life.<br /><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Case 1.</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">What a girl wanted:</span> To suprise her boyfriend... so I once decided to turn up at his house, using the set of keys he had cut for me. I just wanted to see him as we had been going through another rough patch... basically, his complaint was we didn't see each other often enough. As I snuck out of my parents place and disappeared off their radar, I couldn't help smiling to myself... the thought never crossed my mind that he would be anything other than happy to see me.<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Resulting chaos:</span> I caught him in bed with another woman... I stayed there, silent, for what seemed like an age as my mind <span style="color:#cc6600;">screamed</span> ‘not again, not again’. When, I woke them up, he stupidly tried to convince me that it wasn’t what I was thinking… then the <span style="color:#cc6600;">madness </span>ensued.<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Moral: <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Stop flogging a dead horse</span> because <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">a leopard can't change its spots</span>... (& no the moral of the story for the guys isn't 'do not cut keys to your place for your girlfriend').</span><br /><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Case 2.</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">What a girl wanted:</span> To get her groove on… so I drank a glass of double Remy Martin & Coke when I was out with a guy I was seeing… then I started sipping on a second glass but left it, unfinished, when it was time to leave the bar. This I did as I was coming to the end of the course of prescribed amphetamines which I had completely forgotten I had taken earlier that morning.<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Resulting chaos:</span> I passed out and woke up with the <span style="color:#cc6600;">hangover from hell</span>, in a hotel room. I was completely starkers; sporting only the vaguest flashbacks (but no real memory) of the night before.<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Moral: Don’t EVER drink while taking drugs... prescribed or otherwise.</span><br /><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Case 3.</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">What a girl wanted</span>: Love… even the tainted kind... so I let a married man slip his hand inside my bra as my friend drove. When we got to his place to drop him off, I wasted no time in jumping out of the car after he offered to take me home as I lived nearby. I followed him inside, upstairs and into the bedroom to get his car keys.<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Resulting chaos:</span> I had an affair with a married man and ended up becoming a <span style="color:#cc6600;">home wrecker</span>; he left her for me... only to break my heart later.<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Moral: <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder (Mark 10:9)</span>. </span><span style="font-size:0;"><span style="font-size:0;"><br /></span></span><br />Which is my lie?<br /><br />~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~<br /><br />*UPDATED on 07/02/2009*... specifically to hold off the two <span style="color:#cc6600;">hell hounds</span> at my heels (i.e. my dearest <a href="http://afrolicious-babe.blogspot.com/"><span style="color:#990000;">Afrobabe</span></a> and the lovely <a href="http://avartsypoverty.blogspot.com/"><span style="color:#990000;">Avartsy</span></a>)… the answer is now below in inviso text:<br /><br /><span style="color:#000000;">Answer: Case 3 is the lie (truth is I told 2 truths followed by one lie… so I am not really a rule breaker afterall ;-P)<br /><br />I never had any sort of an affair with Serb. I’ve never seen him since that night we dropped him off. I did hear that at the time he was trying to ‘cop a feel’, his loving wife had left for London to give birth to his 2nd child... *shakes head & sighs*... may that never be my portion.<br /><br />I hope and pray that the only married man that I will ever follow into the bedroom will be mine. </span><span style="color:#000000;">AMEN.</span></p>Shubby Doohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739382022583876470noreply@blogger.com67tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5595822356628502752.post-18108034593287773502009-01-09T21:35:00.077+00:002009-05-04T19:50:45.324+01:00the usual suspectsI hope you all had a very Merry Christmas. Wishing you all a happy and blessed start to the New Year.<br /><br />I got back from Lagos on Wednesday. I’ve swapped the heat only to find that being re-immersed in the cold is more unbearable. C'est la vie I guess.<br /><br />I had a fab holiday…<br /><br />OMG, before I forget let me just say that while in Lagos, I watched the Nigerian films ‘<span style="color:#cc6600;">Jenifa</span>’ and ‘<span style="color:#cc6600;">Jenifa 2</span>’... <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">suliat kan, aiyetoro kan</span>… LMAO... filmed in Yoruba but with English subtitles I think part 1 is a must see for all... absolutely hilarious!!!<br /><br />OK... back to the jist of this post... i.e. what I got up to... <a href="http://thehola.blogspot.com/"><span style="color:#990000;">Smaragd</span></a>, just to let you know that I rocked a little at places like Caliente, Penthouse, Insomnia and Auto Lounge… what else did I do?… I went to Federal Palace… I visited Shoprite for the very 1st time (more for necessity than curiosity)… I went to 2 weddings, one kiddie party, and attended our New Year’s Day family event… funny sha this is the first time in years I purposely didn't take my camera out with me. So I've decided to commit, the various snapshots of my memories hanging out with <span style="color:#cc6600;">the usual suspects</span> here. Some, you know… like <span style="color:#cc6600;">Rosetta, Reverie, Spartan, Wole Ray</span> and <span style="color:#993300;"><span style="color:#cc6600;">Jay</span> </span>but others you don't… like <span style="color:#cc6600;">Niata, Ababa </span>and <span style="color:#cc6600;">Kujan</span> plus I met new people like<span style="color:#993300;"> </span><span style="color:#cc6600;">IJ, Ash</span> and <span style="color:#cc6600;">Baer</span>.<br /><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">I just can't believe we're going to walk into certain death</span><br />I hope that Jeremy Hoyland, the British jet skier that went missing off the coast of Bali, two months ago is found safe and sound soon. It just brings home how dangerous our antics could have been. Last Sunday, by the time <span style="color:#cc6600;">Reverie</span> turned up to pick me up, we'd already missed the boat. I had just about given up the ghost on going to the beach but <span style="color:#cc6600;">Reverie</span> decided otherwise.<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Reverie: I was going to go on the Jet Ski by myself but you're coming with me. You know we are going to fall in don't you</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Shubby Doo: Yes… crap… Ok, let's go</span><br /><br />Luckily, we didn't fall into the water as we rode all the way from the ikoyi to ilashe… from behind I clung on to him... and for most of the time I had my eyes closed... so you see when we finally caught up with the boat that had left 20 minutes before us… I was more than just relieved.<br /><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Get yourself laid</span><br />I did.<br /><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">I got thrown this job by some lawyer</span><br />The job was simple really… I just had to let her outshine me… as if. <span style="color:#cc6600;">IJ </span>is one of those girls I normally stay well clear off… she is the kind that name drops and thinks she is the most attractive girl in the room even with her nasty weave. I met her at a wedding that I went to with <span style="color:#cc6600;">Niata</span>. She purposely manoeuvred her bleached... whoops... I meant to say toned body to sit next to the guy I was chatting with and her dumb gob just spoilt the intelligent conversation we were having. 2 hours later at a BBQ, she saw me walking past and stopped me.<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">IJ: Hmmm… You’re the engineer aren’t you?</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Shubby Doo: Yes… & you’re the lawyer</span><br /><br />I walked away and when I came back to sit down she had miraculously remembered my name. I saw her smile fade when <span style="color:#cc6600;">Reverie</span> came to sit next to me. It completely disappeared when <span style="color:#cc6600;">Spartan</span> stopped dead in his tracks as he realised he wasn’t hallucinating, winked at me and then marched straight up to me to say hello.<br /><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Well I believe in God, and the only thing that scares me is Keyser Söze</span><br />The attraction <span style="color:#cc6600;">Spartan</span> and I still share scares me… our chemistry is still as ‘excited’... our <span style="color:#cc6600;">Keyser Söze</span> is still as ‘dangerous’... as it was the 1st day we met… so how exactly we managed to keep politely saying hello to each other without tearing each other's clothes off after a year with no real contact is a mystery. Whatever he is doing… whoever he is with… he stops and drops everything just for me…<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Spartan: Are you ok? </span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Shubby Doo: I'm fine thank you</span><br /><br />I know he doesn't get it but it is not for me anymore. How he always found a way to try and talk to me, hold my waist or stroke my arm in the shadows is beyond me… I was mostly indifferent to it... but the fact that it was always done out of sight of his babe did cause me some concern because I've always know him to be truthful. As far as I'm concerned we are just friends now… it’s an ego thing I think… basically, he cannot understand why I walked away from ‘us’ without blinking… but I’m sure he’ll deal with it soon enough.<br /><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">After that my guess is that you will never hear from him again</span><br />If only. I met <span style="color:#cc6600;">Ababa</span> at the beach 3 years ago… his conversation skills have not matured in that time. Apparently <span style="color:#cc6600;">Jay</span> tells me that <span style="color:#cc6600;">Ababa</span> is ever so shy and quite sweet when he is sober but I guess that means I've only met him when he has had something to drink and his manners have gone to pot.<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Ababa: I love your eyes</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Shubby Doo: Thank you</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Ababa: I wonder what they would look like at the moment of penetration</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Shubby Doo: You'll never know. At 21, I couldn't tolerate such nonsense let alone at this age. Excuse me</span><br /><br />Before I left he asked for my London number. I refused to reply. He went on facebook and wrote nonsense on my wall… my brother ATA says I should just limit profile his ass… I think I might just do that. After that my guess is that he’ll probably not hear from me again.<br /><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">That's funny. He called me last night</span><br />He called and asked me to go outside and look at the moon… I did… and yes everybody has yabbed me already because apparently I should have pretended but then I wouldn't have seen what <span style="color:#cc6600;">Ash</span> was talking about... the bright star shouldering its crescent.<br /><br />I met <span style="color:#cc6600;">Ash</span> at a club I went to with <span style="color:#cc6600;">Niata</span>. I liked him from the very start. We danced and talked and danced some more. He offered to take me home when <span style="color:#cc6600;">Reverie</span> disappeared... chasing women as usual...<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Shubby Doo: Where is he? I can't see him... Ok I'm not going to panic for another 10 minutes... darn... I should have gone home with Niata</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Ash: No you shouldn't. I'm glad you stayed</span><br /><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Anyway, the word is he carries around a lotta cash</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">IJ</span> came to my rescue and took <span style="color:#cc6600;">Baer</span> away from me… he bored me shitless... and I got so sick and tired from rolling my eyes all night… it was that bad.<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Baer: Can you imagine that guy told them to send me the bill for the extra stuff he ordered</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Shubby Doo: I don’t understand. Why would he?</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Baer: I organised the BBQ and paid for it and he had the audacity to send the bill for the extra stuff he ordered to me</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Shubby Doo: Pele… that’s not right</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Baer: People always do that to me. They know I have money and I guess that is what happens when you work like me… I mean I could do a 9 to 5 job but then I wouldn't have as much money and… </span><br /><br />I don’t remember the rest… I’d switched off<br /><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">In English, please?</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Kujan</span> is hilarious… as soon as he gets into London and sees oyinbo people he’s accent switches…even with Nigerians… he just can’t help blowing his phonetics… He took the seat I’d saved for <span style="color:#cc6600;">Reverie</span> at the Christmas table… yet I wasn’t disappointed with his company… we teased each senseless about our accents… I haven’t laughed so much during Christmas dinner like I did with <span style="color:#cc6600;">Kujan</span>… I’m hoping to catch up with him in London sometime this month.<br /><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">A rumor's not a rumor that doesn't die</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Tinuke: Aunty Shubby Doo I saw you and Uncle Reverie flirting</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Shubby Doo: You?!!!… you have started with that active mind of yours again abi?</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Tinuke: You were flirting</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Shubby Doo: Maybe the intensity you saw was me having a go at him. He was supposed to take me somewhere and he didn't</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Tinuke: Hmmm… maybe... I still think you were flirting!!!</span><br /><br />On another occasion when it was time to leave and go home, <span style="color:#cc6600;">Niata </span>came back to tell me that I was, in fact, staying.<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Niata: Your husband said I cannot take you. He says he'll drop you off.</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Shubby Doo: Which husband?</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Niata: Reverie</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Shubby Doo: Hahaha… he came here cause I told him we were coming… we've not really hung out this last week that we've both been back in Lagos… I'll just double check with him but I'll probably stay. Thanks anyway</span><br /><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">You kids ready?</span><br />That’s what I think of <span style="color:#cc6600;">Jay’s</span> girlfriend… a kid… she is totally insecure about my friendship with him… so much so that she stopped him from coming out with me on New Year's Eve despite the fact she couldn't accomodate him in her plans. I told him it was ok… he was so embarrassed. Apparently he warned her well... he felt that she had insulted me and inadvertently got him to insult our friendship. He called to take me out to Terra Culture 2 days later. We then ended up at Sky Bar (EKO Hotel) for dinner. She called every hour… after the 3rd time she called him back immediately to talk to me… apparently she thought it might have seemed rude that she hadn’t asked to say hello… silly girl... if she thinks I'm going to give up on my trusted confidant she has another thing coming.<br /><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Put a leash on that puppy</span><br />Before I left Lagos, <span style="color:#cc6600;">Jay</span> called me.<br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Jay: You need to talk to Reverie. I don't know what you two are playing at but you guys have something and you both don't want to deal with it </span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Shubby Doo: Ok I will</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Jay: No you won't</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Shubby Doo. You are right I won't </span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Jay: Shubby Doo</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Shubby Doo: Swiftly changing the subject… guess who I spoke to last night?… Ash</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Jay: And?</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Shubby Doo: He was a bit ratty… his car had broken down... it over heated... and he was complaining because he hadn’t eaten all day except for a chocolate bar… I told him he sounded irritable so I was going to leave him be... to at least get something to eat… plus I had to go because they had just served up my pounded yam</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Jay: You are wicked…</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Shubby Doo: I know... hahaha... can you imagine that the poor guy couldn't stop himself from asking if it was powdered pounded yam... I gleefully told him it was the real kind… POUNDED YAM!</span><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Jay: Hahaha </span><br /><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he did not exist. And like that... he is gone.</span><br />I got to see my Aunty Grace. She is undergoing the treatment she needs… some days are better than others but she is a pillar of strength… she is doing much better than I’d hoped…<br /><br />For those of you that helped to pray with me when I posted <a href="http://shubbydoo.blogspot.com/2008/10/amazing-grace.html"><span style="color:#990000;">amazing grace</span></a>... Thank you again for your support and kind words... the devil is a liar... she is well in Jesus' name.<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Good Shepherd she is in your hands. Continue to heal her. Please </span>Shubby Doohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739382022583876470noreply@blogger.com52tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5595822356628502752.post-75338256202418346112008-12-15T15:38:00.033+00:002008-12-16T11:22:08.245+00:00yahoozeeLast Christmas, I was rocking in places like Bacchus & 6 degrees North, Volar, No 10, Caliente etc… mainly to the tune of <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Olu Maintain’s Yahoozee</span> but little did I think that dem <span style="color:#cc6600;">yahoozee </span>people wey dey UK fit do me <span style="color:#cc6600;">419</span> this Christmas!<br /><br />Today I panicked when I checked my <span style="color:#cc6600;">account</span> and saw and an <span style="color:#cc6600;">unknown debit</span>… with work paying my December <span style="color:#cc6600;">salary </span>in at the end of this week on Friday, and me leaving on the country on Thursday, I started thinking I for just come back from Lagos see say dey don clear my <span style="color:#cc6600;">account</span> finish…<br /><br />I don’t know why God told me to check my account today…at first, I was like why is the ID for that transaction written weirdly as ‘WWW.TOTALLYSHOES.C, O.UK’?… then a small light bulb came on and I was like I don't know them so why have they taken <span style="color:#cc6600;">money</span> from my <span style="color:#cc6600;">account</span>?… I clicked to investigate further and then I was like hell no…uh uh… I didn’t buy anything last week on the 11th.<br /><br />So I called the <span style="color:#cc6600;">bank</span> and found out that on Thursday, after I had endured my 2nd pointless meeting of the day at work (I guess I should back track and correct that because the 1st meeting was quite necessary and it proved useful)… @ 13:58, my <span style="color:#cc6600;">bank card</span> was used to buy<span style="color:#cc6600;"> </span>something off ‘<a href="http://www.totallyshoes.co.uk/"><span style="color:#990000;">http://www.totallyshoes.co.uk</span></a><span style="color:#990000;">’</span>... I assumed this to be the real website address sha because the one above didn’t make sense…<br /><br />Now with only 3 days before I was to leave for naija… I had to <span style="color:#cc6600;">cancel my bank card</span>… I <span style="color:#cc6600;">checked all the pending transactions</span> on it and confirmed the remaining were mine… they were thank goodness… I confirmed that the <span style="color:#cc6600;">bank</span> could <span style="color:#cc6600;">report it as fraud</span> to the police… I then started to look for my oga to say I’d be finishing work early today to enable me to get to the <span style="color:#cc6600;">bank</span> before it closed to make a <span style="color:#cc6600;">bank declaration</span>…<br /><br />I’d been spitting mad since I looked at my <span style="color:#cc6600;">account</span>… I’m normally so cautious… who likes being ‘<span style="color:#cc6600;">had</span>’?… not me.… I remember laughing long and hard at an oyinbo guy at work about three years ago who got <span style="color:#cc6600;">hustled</span>… for lack of common sense IMO… he and his partner accepted £5000 from a nigerian asking them to transfer about £50,000 into a nigerian's <span style="color:#cc6600;">account</span> for the promise of £100,000… na so money just dey rain from the sky?!… I wasn't surprised to hear that in the end they got nothing back in return… <span style="color:#cc6600;">the </span><span style="color:#cc6600;">cheque bounced</span>… but after loosing £45,000 the police started investigating them for <span style="color:#cc6600;">money laundering activities</span>… me, I don't want wahala so I promptly report all suspect e-mails as <span style="color:#cc6600;">phishing scams</span>.<br /><br />To protect myself from opportunists, I take precautions such as <span style="color:#cc6600;">shredding all my card receipts</span>… I never send my <span style="color:#cc6600;">banking details</span> in e-mails... I only do <span style="color:#cc6600;">internet banking</span> from work because of the nature of the secure work we do… same goes for <span style="color:#cc6600;">internet shopping</span>… I've signed up for <span style="color:#cc6600;">secure</span> <span style="color:#cc6600;">online card verification systems</span> with all but one of my cards and that is only because they are yet to offer it. I rarely do <span style="color:#cc6600;">internet shopping</span> with that <span style="color:#cc6600;">bank </span><span style="color:#cc6600;">card</span> but I did err two weeks ago and then I ended up cancelling the order because the company was useless…<br /><br />So upon all my precautions I sat at my desk completely miffed… the recurring question in my head was... of all the <span style="color:#cc6600;">cards</span> to all my <span style="color:#cc6600;">accounts</span>…why e be de <span style="color:#cc6600;"><span style="color:#cc6600;">account</span> </span>dat my <span style="color:#cc6600;">salary</span> dey enter dem go put hand enter, comot carry go?… I know people can beat the system but I felt so violated… I kept thinking thunda fire their yansh 1 millions times over…<br /><br />I also felt bloody insulted… I would never shop on that site… not my style… not at all… I get taste better pass dat o but how I fit use dat theory as proof for <span style="color:#cc6600;">bank</span>?… I know say I no fit.<br /><br />Then I started thinking maybe they’d be able to track them down with the delivery address used for the purchase…yes, perhaps… and I hope they lock them up and throw away the key when they find them… I just wanted my<span style="color:#cc6600;"> money</span> back.<br /><br />As I got to the end of this post I started thinking of all the things I was yet to get for myself and others for my trip to Lagos… I’d made a list and my eye caught a glimpse of one of the things I had gotten already… yoghurt for the kids… this time a big 1000 watt light bulb came on in my head with a very loud ‘ping’… I remembered an <span style="color:#cc6600;">internet transaction</span> I’d made on 11th December @ 13:51 for yoghurt mix… no no no no… but it was with a company called fraser simpson… they sent me an e-mail saying the <span style="color:#cc6600;">transaction</span> would show as ‘Totally Commerce Ltd’ not ‘WWW.TOTALLYSHOES.C, O.UK’… WTF?!!!<br /><br />I’m going to call fraser simpson and check but the <span style="color:#cc6600;">amount</span> is the same and the time stamps kinda match so I guess it was probably me afterall… lol…<br /><br />If it is I’ll call the <span style="color:#cc6600;">bank</span> back and explain… to think that all that wahala was for nothing… & I'll still have to wait for a new <span style="color:#cc6600;">bank card</span> no matter what, which won't arrive before I leave for Lagos… *shakes head*… I did all that for nothing…<br /><br />Where is <a href="http://afrolicious-babe.blogspot.com/"><span style="color:#990000;">Afrobabe</span></a>?… Afro… Afro… you sure say no be you wan do me juju like this because I no dey carry you go naija with me for Christmas?!!!Shubby Doohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739382022583876470noreply@blogger.com51tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5595822356628502752.post-15124110587836273802008-12-10T00:14:00.035+00:002008-12-15T11:23:15.946+00:00winter wonderland<div align="justify">On sunday, I woke up <span style="color:#cc6600;">shivering from the cold</span> so I got out of bed to turn the central heating on but I found that the <span style="color:#cc6600;">breath of winter</span> still lingered outside my window. I looked down below and realised that this time it had brought with it a healthy <span style="color:#cc6600;">dusting of icing</span>. Tree branches, previously naked were now covered with a fluffy <span style="color:#cc6600;">blanket of snow</span>. The small lanes of the quarry looked like <span style="color:#cc6600;">Eskimo way</span>. In that instant my irritation, caused by the incessant <span style="color:#cc6600;">shrill of the wind</span> the night before, disappeared. Instead, I stood there marvelling at the transformation; there was certainly nothing bleak about this <span style="color:#cc6600;">mid-winter</span> morning because my small world now glistened outside the <span style="color:#cc6600;">transparent</span> <span style="color:#cc6600;">globe</span>. Then I felt that familiar childhood thrill, whistle through me; to run and play outside, in this bright and beautiful <span style="font-size:0;"><span style="font-size:0;"></span></span><span style="color:#cc6600;">winter wonderland.</span><br /><br />~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</div><br />Another reason this post is titled <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">‘winter wonderland’</span> is because I’ve been meaning to take part in <a href="http://geishasong.blogspot.com/"><span style="color:#990000;">Geisha's</span></a> <span style="color:#cc6600;">‘12 days of Christmas’</span> production.<br /><br />On Sunday, again, she asked if I was still interested so I downloaded some recording software, off the internet... the free one sha… with track times limited to 1 minute… a fair compromise, I thought... since I didn't want anybody to have to endure my tuneless <span style="color:#cc6600;">rendition</span> for any significant length of time... lol... Anyway, I decided to record a <span style="color:#cc6600;">song</span> that captured the <span style="color:#cc6600;">joviality </span>in my spirit that morning.<br /><br />So… for the minute few wanting a direct link to my contribution, <span style="color:#cc6600;">5th day of Christmas,</span> click <a href="http://geishasong.blogspot.com/2008/12/on-fifth-day-of-christmas.html"><span style="color:#990000;">here</span></a>.<br /><br />p.s<br />Remember that <span style="color:#cc6600;">’tis the season of love and goodwill</span>… so please o!... easy on the yabs =)Shubby Doohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739382022583876470noreply@blogger.com35tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5595822356628502752.post-56152828464481431952008-12-01T10:04:00.071+00:002009-04-25T09:43:49.472+01:00problem solving<p><span style="color:#cc6600;">Problem solving</span> is considered one of the most complex of all <span style="color:#cc6600;">intellectual functions</span>. It is seen as a higher-order <span style="color:#cc6600;">cognitive process</span> that requires <span style="color:#cc6600;">modulation</span> and <span style="color:#cc6600;">control</span>.<br /><br />So I have a small <span style="color:#cc6600;">problem</span> at the moment… my <span style="color:#cc6600;">root cause analysis</span> of the situation concluded that I over-indulged during my birthday trip… yay. However, if left unchecked, I will look like a beached whale in my bikini this Christmas… boo… besides <span style="color:#cc6600;">Sod's Law</span> dictates dat na facebook dem go use to expose me…<br /><br />So I’m on a diet… <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">T</span><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">he Food Doctor’s Diet</span>… I’ve lost 3 kg in 3 weeks. Not bad but I’m not quite where I want to be yet. The process involves following some simple <span style="color:#cc6600;">rules</span>:</p><ul><li>No sugar – I miss cakes </li><li>No caffeine – I miss drinking tea & coffee… especially at this time of the year… I need it to help combat the cold… mehnn I couldn’t feel my feet last night… seriously, it was like they were encased in ice despite the fact that they were supposedly insulated within a pair of thick socks, a 15 tog duvet and a pretty solid bedspread… I was that cold! </li><li>Eat fat to loose fat – I no sabi dat logic sha but wetin concern me… if it works I'm down!</li><li>Eat 5 times a day – yes o…5 times!… 3 main meals (each two palm/hand size portions) and 2 snacks (each just a palm/hand size portion)… </li><li>No smoking – I don't anyhow</li><li>No stress – Wish someone would tell my boss that</li><li>No simple carbs - I've waved bye bye to white bread, white rice and pasta</li><li>No starchy carbohydrates for dinner (I can only have that for breakfast and lunch) – this means that I cannot look forward to dishes like jollof rice in the evenings :-( </li><li>Increase intake of complex carbohydrates – but I broke my Jack La Lanne juicer as I was cleaning it – I had to stop and ask myself… ‘Shubby Doo how does one break the rotating spring casing while trying to re-assemble it?’… how I did it I don’t know… what I do know is if I was to use it now I’d electrocute myself… I’m bummed out by it because it was the only way to make sure that I got my daily intake of fruit and veg…it’s now a struggle because as a child I was never any good at eating my greens… to be honest I wasn't good at eating full stop…hence the childhood name bone-ga-fish… </li><li>Exercise at least 3 times a week for 20 minutes minimum – so I’m doing my pilates workout (that includes cardio!) every evening. The definition is slowly coming back to my body; I’m toning up and my muscles are leaner ;-)</li><li><span style="color:#cc6600;">Pareto Principle</span> – if I'm good 80% of the time, the other 20% doesn't matter!</li></ul><p>I’ve applied a simple <span style="color:#cc6600;">formula</span> to a small <span style="color:#cc6600;">problem</span> (admittedly to do with my vanity) but I’m very sure that I’ll end up with the right result.<br /><br />These last few weeks I’ve been overwhelmed by the number of bigger <span style="color:#cc6600;">problems</span> out there in the world.<br /><br />Two weeks ago - I sat, flabbergasted, as I watched the documentary on the practice in Akwa Ibom, Nigeria… a classic case of how a perspective on a phenomenon has created one… I mean how the fuck does a community continue its barbaric practice of branding its children as <a href="http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=EUJSME0TORw"><span style="color:#990000;">child witches</span></a> and then torture and kill them?!… in this day and age?! haba…<br /><br />Last week - I was utterly confused as to why those retards entered Mumbai, India… solely for the purpose of reeking havoc at the taj mahal hotel, oberoi trident hotel, caman hotel, nariman place and café leopoid… I keep checking the news and still <span style="color:#cc6600;">opacity</span>… so I’m asking WTF for?!<br /><br />Over the w/e - I was monitoring the religious/ ethnic violent riots in Jos, Nigeria… a result of the contested elections… all the time knowing that the deaths were preventable and absolutely senseless!<br /><br />Today is <a href="http://www.worldaidsday.org/"><span style="color:#990000;">World AIDS Day</span></a> – but I still cannot fathom why people choose to have unsafe sex…people should fucking double bag IMO!<br /><br />Ever heard of the joke <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">‘why is a maths book so sad?… well it’s because it contains so many problems’</span>… but isn't <span style="color:#cc6600;">maths</span> supposed to be ‘the’ universal language of the world?… correction…of the universe as we know it… one that needs no translation to be completely understood… Especially in relation to the <span style="color:#cc6600;">examples</span> given above; I mean why can’t the <span style="color:#cc6600;">foundations of mathematics</span> be used to teach people that the <span style="color:#cc6600;">axioms</span> that they hold true are massively flawed. Simply because each is a starting point from which nothing else logically follows… *sighs*<br /><br />Generally, I live my life holding steadfast to a lesson I learnt in church many years ago…<span style="color:#c0c0c0;"> ‘if you’re not part of the solution you are part of the problem’</span>… but like <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Shakespeare</span> pointed out in <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Hamlet</span>… <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">‘ay, there's the rub’</span>… what is the <span style="color:#cc6600;">solution</span>?… I remember this textbook I had in university… <span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Stroud's Engineering Mathematics</span>… we called it our engineering bible just because it had a detailed worked solution to everything.<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Good Shepherd, why can’t there be a finite answer for each and every one of the world’s problems?…only one right non-elusive answer no matter the method of derivation.</span> </p>Shubby Doohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739382022583876470noreply@blogger.com34tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5595822356628502752.post-22520179648152390942008-11-10T03:28:00.034+00:002010-01-15T00:39:10.900+00:00snow diaries<span style="color:#cc6600;">Friday 7th November</span><br />-My friend, The Doctor, and I flew out of London, Heathrow, at 8:50am - excited<br />-Arrived at the hotel, in Nevada, by 6:30pm - tired<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Saturday 8th November</span><br />-Woken up at midnight by my cousin, Tweet, as she arrives at the hotel - dazed<br />-Hit a club by 1:30am - electric<br />-Back to bed by 4:30am - shattered<br />-Flew over the snow capped mountains of Colorado at 8:30am - breathtaking<br />-At 9:30am I'm in Arizona & stood on the rim of the Grand Canyon - magnificent<br />-Went horse riding on a ranch at 11:15am - hilarious<br />-Experienced a bumpy plane ride back to Nevada at 1:30pm - prayed<br />-Impulsively jumped on a rollercoaster ride at 3:45pm - petrified<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Sunday 9th November</span><br />-Went skydiving at 12:00pm - awesome<br />-Went shopping for gifts for family at 3:00pm - stressful<br />-Headed out for my birthday dinner at 8:00pm - emotional<br />-Ran for a taxi in 4 inch heels so as not to miss the show at 9:30pm - madness<br />-Hit a club by 11:30pm - grooving<br /><br /><span style="color:#cc6600;">Monday 10th November</span><br />-Thanking God because it is my birthday - smiling<br /><br />p.s<br />I just found out that <a href="http://all4words.blogspot.com/2008/11/insomnia-20-enugu-plugs-nevada.html"><span style="color:#990000;">Rayo</span></a> has the same birthday as me. Do drop by hers and wish her a happy belated birthday too :-)Shubby Doohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739382022583876470noreply@blogger.com45tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5595822356628502752.post-25118513071224193662008-11-05T06:05:00.010+00:002008-12-01T17:42:38.516+00:00the audacity of hope<span style="color:#c0c0c0;">‘...While we breathe, we hope.<br />And where are met with cynicism and doubt and those who tell us that we can’t,<br />We will respond with that timeless creed that sums up the spirit of the people,<br />Yes we can.’</span><br /><br /><span style="color:#c0c0c0;">Barack Obama</span>...<br />Is the president elect...<br />Will be the 44th US President...<br /><br />There has never been anything false about <span style="color:#cc6600;">hope</span>.Shubby Doohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02739382022583876470noreply@blogger.com20